Monday, January 18, 2010

Nexus Support Complaints

To much fanfare Google has plunged into the consumer end of the phone market and started direct sales of their new 'Nexus' phone.

There have been complaints about the lack of customer support for the new phone users though. Some are saying that the idea of directly supporting living breathing people is something new for Google (at the time of writing of the article linked to above, there is no Nexus telephone support available !).

If they are pressured into offering phone support, here's what I imagine a typical support call might go like (names changed to protect the guilty):

G: Welcome to Giigle support how may I help you today ?

C: I'm having a problem with my new Nix-Us phone.

G: OK, first though, can you answer this question for me ?
How many basketballs can you fit in a school bus ?

C: What ? I'm not good at math, and anyway why are you asking me this ?

G: Well, I need to know if you're smart enough to be worth my time...
What were you, some kind of a Liberal Arts major ?
OK, well here's one without any scary numbers in it:
Why is a manhole cover round ?

C: I can't answer that, I just need some help with the new phone that I just bought from you !

G: Say, what University did you graduate from anyway ?

C: I didn't get a chance to go to college, I've been working 2 jobs since High School to support my seriously ill Mother, and...

G: That's a lame sounding excuse if I ever heard one..
OK, I've got 4 letters for you: R.T.F.M. (Read The 'Fine' Manual)

C: What ?

(disclaimer: I have a 'Google Android Powered' G-1 phone and love it. I also take advantage of a number of the free services that Google offers and my life has been better for it)

UPDATE: May 14, 2010

Google has announced that it will discontinue direct sales of the Nexus One phone

"...but it’s clear that many customers like a hands-on experience before buying a phone..."

(We'd rather quit than have to deal with people.... )

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