TSA: Tough Shizzle for All

Edit Update: I've just had clarified that the TSA requires either the Full Body Scan OR the Pat Down but not both. So all of the below was my personal delusion. It was fun while it lasted even if it wasn't based in any kind of reality !


This past week I flew out to see my nephew in his school's production of West Side Story. Aware that the airports were now host to the latest round of more stringent 'TSA Quality (of the passenger) Assurance' tests I arrived at the airport at what I assumed was a ridiculously long 1.75 hours before my flight was scheduled to take off. I was right and I was wrong. I was right to arrive that early, and I was wrong that arriving that early was crazy. By the time I got through security my plane was in line to take off in 5 minutes.

While waiting in line I mused at how progression of TSA procedures seems to have been totally and only reactive..

What ? people used box cutters as weapons ? OK, from now on no more blades.
What ? someone got explosive liquids on the plane ? OK, from now on restrict and inspect the liquids.
What ? someone had shoe bomb ? OK, from now on off come the shoes
What ? someone stuffed explosives in their underwear ? OK, from now on 'enhanced' search.

Now, what would the future hold if someone makes use of a 'false eye bomb' ? 'OK, from now on an opthamologist's inspection ?'

One poor woman waited her hour+ in line only to have her CA driver's license ID rejected because it had expired a few months ago.. So despite the facts that it likely was a valid license until recently AND the picture looked like the (maybe) passenger: REQUEST DENIED. Seriously, if I were to make a fake ID in order to slip past security, wouldn't I be careful to make the counterfeit appear to be valid ? I wished that I could have stuck around to see the outcome, but I was getting close to missing my own plane so I didn't.

I knew that I'd be in for the full body scan but I wondered if there was anything I could do that would decrease my chances of getting the 'pat down' treatment. We don't know (and shouldn't know) the methodology by which the TSA agents decide who gets it and who doesn't. It might be a blind sequencing algorithm or it might be up to the agent's discretion or a combination of both. Since I can't influence any machine like algorithm, the best I can to is to look as much as possible as the opposite of a threat. One would think that this would mean to look as ordinary as possible, but isn't that exactly what a 'threat' would do ? To try and be inconspicuous ? So I decided that since most of the people flying will probably be dressed in every day drab clothing or in business attire, I would be conspicuous but not over the top.. to look like I'm on vacation (which I was) and obviously NOT trying to hide something that I don't want people to see.

I wore the bright clothing seen in the photo above.

Yes, after going through the scanner, the man in the three piece suit ahead me got the pat down. When I stepped up after him, the TSA agent barely looked at me gave me the weary wave 'go on your way'.

This is Wrong

This last Sunday's New York Times Magazine contained a full page AmericanAirlines advertisement that lept out at me immediately. .

It's so WRONG !

You see, above the bold heading 'BEIJING' is a picture of Southern Chinese Lion Dancers. The Lion Dancers from BeiJing would be in a completely different style of costume whose appearance is dominated by long shiny silky golden hair. What were they (not) thinking, whoever put this ad together ?

A similar U.S. Folk Art mistranslation might be to consider an Appalachian Folk Singer to be interchangeable with a Mississippi Delta Blues Singer. Well, why not, they're both Singing Americans with Guitars, right ? WRONG !

I shouldn't be so difficult though. I'm sure that in some Chinese newspaper somewhere, there are Travel Advertisements beckoning the new moneyed classes to come visit Seattle and see the Mardi Gras :-)

Holiday Getaway and a Death Knell

I loaded up my trusty Triumph and got out of town for a holiday weekend overnight.
So that I would miss the heavy return traffic on the last day of the holiday weekend, I timed my return to take place on the day after.

I stopped for a snack at a gas station and noticed the local newspaper headline. It shouted loudly to me the death knell of the daily paper. The right hand panel read:

"Bridge won't reopen today"

referring to the San Francisco Oakland Bay Bridge work that closed down the bridge over the weekend. Of course this headline was completely WRONG. The Bridge DID indeed reopen that day. In all fairness to the paper editors, it probably was true that at the time that the paper was being composed, it looked like the bridge would not reopen, so they went ahead and printed that story. Once printed and distributed, you can't change or easily callback all the papers. This shortcoming will be the death of the daily newspaper. Situations can change too quickly for the 12 hour (or whatever it is) printed newspaper issuance cycle. Anyone that heard local news on broadcast television or read an on-line news source got the 'true' story: The Bridge DID reopen that day. The newspaper was wrong.

This isn't to say that the printed newspaper is dead though. I still have a subscription to the Sunday New York Times. I don't subscribe to it for the main news section, I subscribe for the Business, Arts and Books sections and for the weekly 'magazine'. The editors of those sections consistently choose topics that I both find interesting and might not go out of my way to look for. That's the true value of a paper to me, the editor's who are on the lookout where I usually don't explore (no 'wisdom of the crowd' concept applies here).
So despite the rising subscription rates for a paper that's getting thinner every month, I look forward to getting it on Sunday mornings. I hope the death of the daily newspaper doesn't sink the Sunday editions.. what would I do then ? sigh...

Homeward Bound

I caught sight of someone taking their classic Ford out for a July 4th spin. Only managed to get the front half of the car in my action shot but take my word for it though, the rear half the car matched the style of the front half exactly !

Next shot: No trip down US 101 south of Eureka is complete without rolling through the 'Avenue of the Giants'. One interesting bit about Redwood trees is that their roots are very shallow. The roots of the trees in a stand are intertwined so that as group the trees are holding each other up. United we stand, indeed.

My trip read is the autobiography of Kate Adie the BBC news correspondent. I had heard so many BBC broadcasts that opened with "Presented by Kate Adie" that I became curious about who she was. A pioneering BBC broadcast journalist, she had to start off being handed 'female appropriate' 'Homemaking' assignments. Her mettle in handling more 'serious' topics became apparent over time and it's telling that the photo on the cover of her autobiography 'The Kindness of Strangers' shows her in war correspondent battle dress complete with her blood type written in big letters on the front of a shoulder strap (!). The account of her pioneering days in getting new BBC programming off the ground reads with a great sense of perspective and humor and takes us along into a world where the paths to the attainment of goals are fraught with setbacks and detours, but a steadfast eye on the ultimate destination along with an uncanny ability to 'wing-it' can lead to surprising results (or spectacular failures !). A very good read so far. 1/2 left to go. Highly recommended !

Brrrr.. No C-C-C-Coos Bay to-d-d-daaay

It was a cold, foggy and overcast day today along the California and Oregon coasts. A bit adverse to making it up to Coos Bay and having time to wander around at an appropriately leisurely pace. So I wandered around the coast not quite so north as I had originally planned. There were a lot of other people on motorcycles going up and down this beautiful coastline today, um, 99% of them with windshields so appropriate for the weather.. Speaking of the weather, I learned today that the weather conditions in the areas that I ranged over are uniquely suited to the cultivation of very good Easter Lily Bulbs. That thought made my day, actually...

3 day chopper getaway

I looked at my calendar and noticed that I hadn't taken any vacation time since last Sept. Well, we need to remedy that ! So I'm off for 3 days heading north to Oregon. I'd like to swing by Coos Bay, OR. I was last in Coos Bay in 1978 visiting my sister who lived there at the time. That visit was my first close contact with small town life. My sister's friends thought that I was a complete paranoid freak from the city constantly insisting on locking things (like vehicles) anytime we were leaving them. This was a town where no one bothered to lock the doors to their houses when no one was at home. It's a likely bet that things are a little different now, 30 years later.
On this trip I'm taking my Honda Fury, a bike not suited to making this kind of journey. There's no real luggage capacity, the seat is skimpy and hard and there's no wind protection. I've done many motorcycle miles on bikes with at least a minimal windscreen which makes it possible to do many miles at high speed per day. So this time it will be fewer miles at slower speeds. All the better notice more with not a chance of getting a speeding ticket. While on the open highway I caught up on a lot of my favorite podcasts: Culture, News, Technology and History from BBC, Deutsche Welle, PRI, Radio Australia, Radio Romania, Radio Austria, Radio Japan and NPR. It's a relaxing luxury to be able to listen to the queued up casts serially and completely.
One of the action shots shown was taken while passing a vineyard. It's sobering to think that 90 years ago or so, making wine would be illegal. Times change.

Cultural Exchange along the Continental Divide

A few summers ago, I found myself traveling through Glacier National Park in Montana. Spectacular.
To experience the beauty of the place more intimately, I stopped at the summit for a hike out to
'Hidden Lake'. The park being a big tourist draw, there were a wide range of people in
various degrees of readiness for hiking on a slippery trail covered in snow under unpredictable skies. On this trip I was travelling by motorcycle so cargo space was at a premium. Still, I had planned in advance on a hike in Glacier so I made the space to take along hiking boots, a weather jacket and a good pole.
The beauty of the place was overwhelming and for some, so was the terrain.
As the trail became more demanding, the less prepared/motivated turned back leaving only
the true believers seeking the Hidden Lake promise. At the lake, we, the self-chosen few,
were treated to the sight of a baby mountain goat that chose to linger.
Cameras clicked (mine included !) The kid eventually got bored of stardom and
deftly descended the steep mountain face below us.. Ah, the kid functioning in its
natural environment ! During the hike back, a cloud moved in and showered upon us, the chosen few.
To my mind, this added a dimension of 'roughing it'. Overcome adversity with resolve we would.
In front of me is an Indian family. Father, mother, daughters, son, all decked out in city gear.
No boots, shells or poles here. We're all gingerly picking our way along the snowed in hillside
together. A slip here, a slip there and steep drop off inches to our right.
The Father looks at me and I confirm the mutual fear we both share of losing our footing
and falling down the side of the mountain. We steel ourselves and press on.
I have it easier actually. I have only myself to worry about.
He has the added personal concern for his family on his shoulders.
Some time passes and we hear loud yelling behind us. 'Oh Gawd', I think,
'Someone's gone over the side' ! The father turns around and I see the bewilderment on his face,
mouth agape..
expression frozen.

I turn around to face the situation. A family behind us
is having the time of their lives sliding down the steep snowy mountain side on their butts,
shrieking with delight at the sensation.
The Indian father smiles, shakes his head and says to me:
'You know, I was afraid for my life back there.
Just look at them jumping off the side of the mountain like that !
This is *their* environment and we're foreigners here !'